24

Twenty-four years ago, I was a very unsure nineteen year old with plenty of dreams and no common sense. But I knew one thing for sure, I loved Tom Edelmayer. We were standing on the edge of the rest of our forever together. Somedays I wish that I could go back to that day and feel the excitement of not knowing what was going to happen and dreaming of all that could. Yet there is a pleasant satisfaction in knowing that I know him and he knows me. I am grateful for the little things that we have hung onto throughout the years that identify our love for each other. I am not even sure that we remember anymore why they got started in the first place but we continue to use them like comfortable blankets.

I fell up a mountain for him when we met. We went up to Meadow Lake for a picnic. I challenged him to a race up a short trail (full well knowing that he would let me win) and half way up, I tripped. I slid without even getting my hands out in front of me. I believe I had dirt in my teeth and other odd places that are not ok to talk about on this blog. He stiffled his laughter long enough to pick me up and attempt to dust me off without inappropriate first date touching. I was mortified and truly believed that he would drop me off at the end of the date and sigh "Good riddence". But instead he smiled with his grey blue eyes, kissed me on the cheek and told me that he would call me. I told my roomates that he was the man I was going to marry. Fortunately for me he allowed me the opportunity to fullfill that prophecy:)

As a nurse, I frequently care for people with chest pain and I ask them to describe the pain to me. I usually have to ask questions like..."Is it a sharp pain like someone is stabbing you? Or a dull ache like heartburn, radiating down your arm and up into your neck?" I think this is a lot like what happens after this many years of being married. I remember when we first met and for many years after we were first married. He would walk into the room or brush up next to me and my heart would quicken its pace, beating rapidly, sharply. Now it is more like my heart moves in rhythm with his, radiating through our whole home when we are in sync. I loved the quick excitement that our youth brought but I am content with the strong, radiating comfort that our maturity brings.



I am grateful for his involvement in his children's lives. This is a man who was involved in many activities, hunting, fishing, golf, sports of all kinds. He was almost 26 years old when we married and I can honestly say that for many years I felt like I ran a "close" second to activities and his family. However, as our children have grown up following their dad around and frequently participating in those activities, his love for those activities became something more. It became about his love for his children. He no longer goes to play golf for himself. He goes to watch and tweek his children's golf game as they develop their own loves for the things he once loved to do. I love his enthusiasm for their talents and his willingness to share how he feels about them with anyone that will listen.

Over the years, if there were one word that I could attach to Tom it would be honest. Honest in every aspect of his life. I think if there were a gene for honesty, Tom has it in the nucleus of every cell of his body. He tells it how it is. Never pulls any punches. He would never slight anyone or anything. Take for instance his employment. I have never known any foundation that he has ever formed and poured that was more than 1/16th off square. For any one that knows concrete, that is extremely difficult to do. He has never asked anyone that has worked for him to do anything that he wasn't willing to jump in and do himself. This work ethic also applies to his spiritual work in the church.

Twenty-four years is a long time for anything. We have beat the odds in so many ways. I remember going to Mikael's neurologist when he was about ten for a check-up. It had been years since Tom had gone with us as he was busy making a living and I had kind of taken over that job. The doctor was surprised to see him and made the comment that he never would have bet that we would have stayed married. Marriages have a difficult time surviving normal everyday struggles. Add in there a chronically ill child, mounting medical bills, and a plethora of other odds and it really is amazing that we still like each other. As we face each new challenge that seem to arise at every corner we turn, I am so very grateful that we are doing it together, 24 hours of everyday, for the last 24 years.

I loved this man when I met him and I will continue to love him for many more years to come.